Expectations for Chores and Playtime
Here are some tips parents can use when they start expecting their children to help out with household chores.
Articles within this series
- Overview
- Expectations for Chores and Playtime
- Expectations for Behavior
- Expectations Regarding Temperament
- Next Steps / Related Information
Expectations for Household Chores
Your child can begin helping around the house at an early age. The results of his help will differ depending on age.
Toddlers and preschoolers like to help. If you allow them to be a part of your daily chores, expect them to not be very helpful at times — and to make a bigger mess. Help them feel included in what you are doing by giving them simple tasks, such as putting away unbreakable groceries, wiping up a spill or putting away folded socks
School-aged children can be assigned household chores. Younger children within this group should be given tasks that include a limited number of steps (picking up toys or taking out the trash). You can increase their responsibilities as they show ability to handle the easy jobs.
Although a child may be old enough to do simple chores, parents’ expectations for how the chore is completed may not be met. Some children need extra help knowing how to do a job right.
Telling a child to “clean your room” can be too vague. To get the best results, be specific about what you want. Write down (or take pictures of) the steps involved in completing the chore and post them on the refrigerator.
Example: “Cleaning Your Room”
Step 1. Put toys in toy box.
Step 2. Put books on shelf.
Step 3. Make your bed.
Step 4. Put dirty clothes in hamper.
If you still don’t get what you expect, you may need to be even more specific. Some children have difficulty following directions or steps in a series. Walk them through each step a few times until they get the hang of it.
Make sure you are flexible in your approach. For moms and dads who are lovers of the spick-and-span look, limit your expectations in this area as you teach your children to become responsible and helpful members of the family.
Expectations for Playtime
Have you ever tried to schedule a play date for a 1-year-old only to end up watching her play alone? A play date doesn’t live up to its name until children reach 2 years old. Let your child’s age be your guide as to the type of play to expect.
Parallel play. Even when other children are present, the typical 1-year-old will play alone. She won’t interact with other children but will show an interest in what they are doing and may mimic what she sees.
Simple social play. Between 15 and 18 months of age, your child will start to interact with other children while playing. She will talk to her playmate, and they may exchange toys.
Cooperative play. Around 24 months of age, children begin to truly play together. As they get older, they will play make-believe or turn-taking games like hide-and-seek. Begin to teach about sharing during this time. Toys that are designed for use by more than one child are more likely to be shared –– dollhouses, climbing toys, dress-up toys, cooking toys.