Expectations Regarding Temperament

Temperament - Appropriate Expectations

You can build appropriate expectations regarding your child's temperament by becoming aware of his way of relating to the world. Begin with these basic facts about temperament:

• Temperament is stable over time. However, it can be influenced by environment and parenting styles.
• Temperament emerges early. Parents often get a sense of their child’s temperament in the first few months of life.
• Temperament is consistent across situations. Your child will act in similar ways with you and other caregivers.

Activity: Answer the following questions to assess aspects of your child’s temperament.

1. How easily does your child adjust to change?
2. How physically active is she?
3. Is she easily distractible?
4. Is her mood generally positive or negative?

Based upon these and other characteristics, researchers Alexander Thomas and Stella Chess have classified infant temperaments into three broad categories.

• Easy babies. These babies adjust easily to change, are active and generally possess a positive mood.
• Difficult babies. These babies don’t like change, tend to be irritable and react negatively to new situations.
• Slow-to-warm-up babies. These babies need time to adjust to new situations, are not very active and have a somewhat negative mood.

Some babies show characteristics of all three styles. Once you understand your child’s temperament, you can build appropriate expectations for her.

For example, an “easy” child may be able to spend a busy day going from appointment to appointment with you. This same schedule would cause a “difficult” child to become upset.

Building temperament-appropriate expectations will help you to create an environment in which your child will flourish.

Discipline Evaluation

Use this evaluation to track the types of discipline you use. Over the course of one week you may find that some forms of discipline don’t work for your child or don’t reap the desired result. In this case, try substituting another form of discipline and then track how your child responds.

The goal is to find techniques that work with your child while building a healthy parent-child relationship.

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Child’s Behavior
Discipline Used
Child’s Response
Child’s Behavior
Discipline Used
Child’s Response
Child’s Behavior
Discipline Used
Child’s Response

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